Regulation-based parenting needs to take into account the arousal of the child. As stress increases arousal also increases and this will change what the child is open to.

Children's outbursts are similar to a volcano - things can go fine and then a trigger occurs. The child's behaviour begins to build up until an explosion happens. After the explosion, there is a winding down stage that may be followed by remorse and then a return to calmness. Sometimes the triggers are unclear, and the outbursts appear sudden and unpredictable. In addition, the wind down stage may be characterised by numerous further eruptions before calmness is finally restored.

Key Points

• Caregivers need to understand the arousal level of the child and adjust their parenting in line with this.
• This will guide the caregivers in using regulation and PACE to support the child.
• Some of the more traditional parenting strategies to support behaviour can also be used if these are adapted to take into account the need for regulation and connection via PACE.